I humbled myself with

scarves

veils

abayas

stood on the ledge

timid

and jumped

no air in my lungs as I plunged downwards

punished by gravity for daring

I tried again

wrenched swords from green and white fabric

that served only to pierce my belly

spilling the honey from inside

I dug my nails into the glass

climbed upwards

renewal that I demanded

never offered

I stared out across the great desert of sky

and breathed

and prayed

and breathed

I pasted scared texts of olives and figs

together with sermons

of self-help and love languages

stapled into my shoulders

iron curled around the marrow of my bones

and still i fell down

flapping my arms

useless as the promises of salted earth

tatters of words

like snow

tumbling long after my plummet

my body a battleground

I wind just by making it back to the top

I kept lists of my missteps

learned the physics of my falls

and with math and metal

hammers and heat

I forged a carriage

it took me over the cliff

and held me aloft

and when the sun set

my tired machine set me

gentler than before

on the earth

where equilibrium commands

it took me years to climb back up

but when I did

i knew the next time I jumped

it would just be me

so I patterned my flesh

and traced it with a scalpel

peeled it back

stretchd it out

made my history into vellum

I stitched skin together with shaking hands

into wings

and instead of jumping

this time

fluttering and furious

screaming peace at creation

my feet left the ground

the world is striking from here

You can bury

A corpse in a ditch

Or you can bury a seed

Beware of those

Who say, their treatment

Is what made you tough

Some insist

That poisoned soil

Grows nothing but salt

After downpours

Green springs up

Chasing the sun and moon

Dandelions

Do not ask to be plucked

But their seeds float anyway

Considered weeds

To adult minds, but

Handled with love by children

Feathers disperse

Carried by breaths of wind

To grow in brighter fields

A final dance

To those we lost

And those who regrew